expecting a new arrival?
Expecting a new arrival? A new pregnancy can bring much joy, some frustrations, and a few challenges to the home, but count it all as joy!
Such a cuddly bundle! Those tiny fingers, tiny toes, sweet little mouth and oh yes! That screaming and constant crying in the middle of the night because of a poopy diaper, or want of a warm bottle! How did such a nice thought of your new baby coming into the world suddenly get turned on its head by these kinds of thoughts? Well, as life would have it, your new baby will bring all these events into your world. They will be pleasant as well as non pleasant.
If you indeed are awaiting your new arrival, your thoughts and emotions may be everywhere. Depending on your state in life at the moment (financial, emotional, spiritual, relational with the father of the baby, etc.), all sorts of thoughts and ideas may plague you about the future of this new baby and how she/he will affect your home and work life. But, not to worry, God has it all planned out for you. Now you just have to listen to Him for guidance and direction.
pregnancy blues: a part of expecting a new baby
Before your new baby comes, you may experience a few blue and down moments during your pregnancy. I certainly did while I was pregnant with my daughter. You may have various worries and physical events that happen in your pregnant state such as:
- Morning sickness. Some mothers experience this at various degrees, especially around the first trimester of pregnancy. You may want to discuss this with your doctor or other seasoned mothers who have gone through this difficult time.
- Aching back and muscle spasms. This can put a damper on the joy of carrying a baby around, that's for sure! Also talk to your doctor, midwife, or specialist about how to ease pain.
- Swollen feet and ankles. I find that most women who are expecting suffer from these ailments as well. For me, elevating my feet helped a lot and eating less salt in my diet kept me from being so bloated. Consult with your doctor on this.
- Depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. Many expected mothers suffer from this more so after birth, which is named as postpartum depression. However, there are some who must deal with this throughout all of their pregnancy and even after the baby is born. Your doctor or other mental health practitioners can help you get past this also.
- Tender breasts and sore nipples. Yikes do I remember this all too well! I believe most women experience this at one time or another in their pregnancies and thereafter, especially while trying to breast feed. This can go from a light tenderness to being downright ugly and painful! Each woman has her own unique experience of course, but we all tend to go through the same kinds of hurts and pains within our pregnant states. Your doctor, midwife, or other experienced moms can help you with this problem too. And, of course there is,
- Less to no sex at all, or sexual constraints. I realize this can be a touchy subject for some married couples who are expecting, but it can be a difficult and very concerning situation for those who are suffering through this problem. Some doctors will say not to engage in sexual relations at some part of the pregnancy, especially during the last trimester, and others may say that it is safe to have sex all throughout the pregnancy as long as it is comfortable in doing so. Each situation may be different. Also, speak with your doctor, midwife, or specialist on this subject as they can counsel you and your spouse on what to do.
make expecting your new arrival a joyous occasion for you and your family
Perhaps this new baby will be the first for you and your spouse; or could it be that your new addition will be the second, third, fourth, or should I keep counting? Whatever the number is, you can be assured that it is God's will for your life and of the rest of your family, that you are experiencing the joy and happiness from this blessed event.
To me, there is nothing more fun than having a new baby in the home. So many preparations go into expecting the arrival of your precious bundle of joy. Here are a few things you might expect as you plan for your new addition to the family:
- Lots of attention towards you (mom) and the new baby. This part does get exciting because all of a sudden you are getting much attention due to your pregnant state. Make sure however, that your husband also gets the attention due to him on being a new dad. It may seem a bit trivial to some, but it's not really. Sometimes men feel distant or unappreciated during this time of their wives's pregnancy, as so much attention is focused on the woman and expecting the new baby. Some fathers tend to feel pushed back in their role as a dad, so he should be affirmed and appreciated often here. After all, he did help out in the creation of your new baby!
- Baby showers, gifts, and celebration of the new arrival. Sometime during or after your pregnancy, you and your family may enjoy these tangible blessings that happen many times when celebrating with family, friends, co-workers, or church members. This may or may not occur in your situation, or there may not be other family or friends to help out in times like these with gifts and such, but rest assured that the Lord celebrates with you as He has created your little one out of His own timing; His purpose and love to you and the family unit. The gift of life is always something to be celebrated.
- Positive attitude and good feelings toward the unexpected pregnancy. Perhaps getting pregnant came as a shock to you, your husband, and your entire family. You will now experience a new phase in your life with your beautiful new son or daughter, which should hopefully conjure up positive attitudes and good feelings towards the change that is coming. If this is not the case, ask the Lord in prayer and supplication to change your (or your husband's) attitude and melt your heart towards the new arrival.
- Making plans for the new baby's arrival. Here is where it gets fun and exciting! Gathering little baby clothes, diapers, baby furniture, and nursery supplies get the family in the mood of acceptance and fulfillment in knowing there will be a new presence in the home. If you have younger or older children, get them involved in helping this process along. Have them help you get the nursery room ready, or the bed for where the baby will sleep, help you baby-proof the home, or help in gathering up baby supplies for him/her. At times the other children in the home get a bit skittish or jealous in finding out they will have to share a room or their toys, or mom and dad's attention with a tiny baby around. Furthermore,
- Counsel with friends, other family members, doctors, church members, or your pastor about expecting your new baby and the various challenges it brings to the family. In the beginning, you may not feel this is needed, but trust me, it helps to get some spiritual advice and a new perspective on the various challenges and frustrations that can arise in families who are expecting a new baby. A host of things can crop up that you may not have thought of, such as: knowing whether or not your son/daughter will be born with a disability, or, how to handle various health ailments if your child is sickly, or how to handle those temper tantrums, etc. Believe me, everyone has something to say or an opinion on these subjects and more! Do not forget the grandparents in your family as a resource for help and wisdom during this time as well. They are blessed with a world full of ideas and information you could use. They went through it already!
expecting big changes, now that your new baby has arrived
Now that your new bundle of joy has arrived, things will change as you flow through a daily routine with your child. Of course, you will want to discuss these changes that will take place even way before the baby is born, and hopefully have planned for some of them already. Your life will be so different when a baby is in the house.
As you go through each stage of your baby's growth and development, various situations will crop up and throw you for a loop if you and your husband don't plan for them way ahead of time. Here are a few changes that may take place as you plan for the expected, or unexpected events in your child's life:
- Childcare/Daycare planning. Will you and your husband decide to send your little Susie or Johnny off somewhere while you and he go to work? Or will you have grandparents step in to help you out? Possibly you can stay home with your child as a stay-at-home mom, or you may have to look for outside help in a nanny, babysitter, childcare/daycare center, or home daycare if you are a working mom. If your job or company offers family leave time, perhaps you or your husband can stay home at least until your situation calls for looking outside the house for childcare. Whatever the case may be, this kind of situation may take a bit of planning, so begin early. Personally, my husband and I decided I would stay home for the first 3 years of our daughter's life, and then after that, I returned to work while our daughter went to the same daycare where I was employed. This really worked out for us and was helpful in that she was right there on the premises and I could know of her welfare right there close by. In essence, you just have to do whatever works for you and your family.
- Sudden loss of a home, job, or family member. These kinds of events are unforeseen and can happen anytime to a family, even when they are expecting a new baby to come.. Life happens anyway, although we may have previously created big plans for it. These kinds of events bring along sadness, grief, depression, and anxiety about what the future holds. The Holy Spirit will bring you comfort and guidance as to where He will lead you through these difficult times and show you what you must know and do. John 16:13 tells us this so beautifully, "Howbeit when He, the Spirit of truth, is come, He will guide you into all truth: for He shall not speak of Himself; but whatsoever He shall hear, that shall He speak: and He will show you things to come."
- When moving around a lot. You may be experiencing issues of having to move from place to place, such as with a job/career which requires a lot of traveling. Or, perhaps you and your family have a Christian ministry, or on the mission field that may cause you to travel from place to place. No doubt this is hard on a family when trying to settle down in one area; when the children's friends, family, schools, and church become uprooted by this type of change. And furthermore,
- When you are told by a doctor that your new little baby has been born with, or will have to live with a certain disability or an ongoing health issue/challenge for life. This is always a parent's worse nightmare, heartbreaking for the entire family, and very tough to deal with. No parent wants to see his/her son or daughter suffer through anything in life so difficult. You may have to plan for future home care or a good health plan for your child. Also, expecting one challenge or issue to be solved today can suddenly change by tomorrow. Instead of making huge plans, you may just have to resolve to live day by day, just as we all should do. The Lord gives comfort in every kind of need and trouble. Matthew 6:25-34 states this so well. Jesus said, "Therefore I say unto you, 'Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Behold the fowls of the air; for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your Heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? Which of you by taking one thought can one cubit unto his stature? And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: And yet I say unto you, that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall He not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? Therefore, take no thought, saying, 'What shall we eat? or, what shall we drink? or, wherewithal shall we be clothed? (For after these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.'"
Expecting a new arrival in your home can be the most joyous time in your family's life, even if offsets, unforeseen circumstances, and/or obstacles occur throughout life with this new one. God has smiled upon your family in bringing you a tiny little present such as this, and who has been created in His image.
As you spend time with your infant in loving, teaching, and training him/her; make sure that in doing so you are parenting in the right ways that please God by raising and building up your son or daughter in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Help your new baby to learn and grow, reaching full potential in mind, body, and spirit, and, at the time of understanding, by pointing him/her to our dear Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. May your family be truly blessed, while you are expecting.
Disclaimer: I am not a medical doctor, practitioner, mental health professional, or specialist of any sort, nor do I profess to be one. The materials contained on this website are for general information and educational purposes only and do not constitute medical, mental, or other professional advice on any subject matter. This website is not intended to diagnose or treat any medical or mental condition. For mental/medical diagnosis and/or treatment, please seek out a certified medical/mental practitioner. I do not accept any responsibility for any loss which may arise from reliance on information contained on this website. Thank you.
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